oathshackledbird | SoulGemmed Mailbox

[What a sweet summer child. He wonders what Diarmuid thinks of him- because that's what he wants, in fact. The Wraith issue is extraneous really. Laurent doesn't need that to disappoint people.]

There's a reason three groups went down. Just as there's a reason for that game you mentioned in August.

Do you really think every one of them will stay put?

[While he replies- while Diarmuid is distracted- Laurent goes to re-fit Maribelle with anything Diarmuid might've removed for her comfort. He's taking her back home before he relaxes.]

[As much as Diarmuid would like to continue petting the horse, when Laurent starts refitting her to get her ready to leave, the knight steps back.]

I do-

[He pauses and remains silent for several moments before sighing deeply.]

I want to believe they will listen to reason, but every time I hope that, they do exactly the opposite of what reason dictates.

[This is the main reason Diarmuid has kept himself completely out of the arguments that have been going on. Every time he hopes something good might come of a discussion it is derailed into some kind of petty squabbling. It's like they don't care about the big picture and their common enemy at all.]

We have to tell someone. Just two people knowing is not enough.

[There have to be a few they can trust not to use the information incorrectly, right?]

This is not a world where optimistic beliefs hold, my dear knight.

[All casual-like, he's leading his horse out of the court yard. ]

I'm getting Maribelle out before she gets spoiled.

[Laurent slips in a notice between two distracting statements, in-between breaths as if his cynical worldview was as surprising to him as the horseness of his horse. Nothing to see here. If Diarmuid wants to talk about the matter the horse was held hostage for, he should do it now.]

We'll tell the sinewave Strider and Hood. Anyone you have in mind?

Kakyoin.

[The answer comes without hesitation.]

Even if he's not leading any longer, he still has connections to a lot of people. He'll make sure those who need to know do.

[Diarmuid tries to think of some others, but he realizes, suddenly, that between being injured and everything else that has happened recently, he doesn't know if any of the new arrivals have shown leadership qualities. He needs to fix that.]

Lets start there and see where things go.

[Oddly enough, with all the walking toward the door Laurent is doing, he doesn't seem to be making progress. The mischievous glint in Diarmuid's eyes might explain that as he subtly shifts the set up of his house to keep both man and horse away from their goal.]

Aren't you forgetting something?

[He expected Kakyoin. Laurent's about to make a sarcastic comment when he senses the house shift around him, notices that the door isn't any closer. He's considered this possibility; it doesn't make its happening any less alarming.

This is why he'd been unwilling to come back- if Diarmuid turned on him the odds of getting Maribelle out safely are slim at best. It doesn't occur to Laurent that Diarmuid might have benign intentions. Nothing associated with ‘hostage’ has ever been benign.

When Diarmuid speaks Laurent startles, pulling hard on the reigns so that Maribelle cries in confusion and jerks back. Flashing weakness goes against every instinct he has, but it's gotten to Diarmuid earlier. (And his other option is to kill the man before the house mobilises, which is not great.)

He carefully widens his eyes and avoids going for his sword.]

What do you want?

[He is a breath away from his actual fear reaction (the sword).]

[Diarmuid tsks under his breath, calmly crossing his arms over his chest but doesn't move any closer to Laurent or the horse. Talk about overreacting.]

Will you please calm down? You're upsetting Maribelle. Do you really think I am going to hurt either of you? What will it gain me?

[Besides, it would have been a lot easier to hurt--if that was his intent--before he put Laurent on a hair-trigger.]

However, I did request a talk and I would like to have it. Will you please explain what happened earlier? I didn't mean to upset you, but I did anyway. If nothing else, I would like to know what to avoid so I don't upset you again.

My horse has been poisoned before. I couldn't save her.

[He is not over reacting!!!!! ~~He is~~]

So pardon me for not banking her life on a friendly face-

[He has no idea how to be sympathetic. No references. Hostility is the only thing he knows. rip.

Now that cat’s out of the bag, he watches Diarmuid for any sign that he's given the man an interesting idea to try. Then the words register.

His stare stretches on.]

…. what are you asking for?

What?

[The word comes out of his mouth soft and half strangled in shock. After taking a moment to gather himself, he throws his hands out in an all-encompassing gesture.]

This! This kind of thing is exactly what I wanted to avoid! If I had known someone hurt her before, I never would have even jokingly suggested I might hurt her!

[Nope, not giving him any ideas here. He's horrified at the very thought of it!]

I am asking for a way to avoid all this. I am asking for just...just a little trust. I know it's not easy, but please. I don't want to keep stumbling into topics that hurt you when it can be avoided. I don't like hurting people, not even accidentally!

[Diarmuid appears both sympathetic and angry. Man and horse, lacking either brain capacity or social experience to understand this upset, are both flummoxed. Laurent reaches to pat his horse, to calm her down, though his own hard expression suggests an unwillingness to do the same.]

So this is my fault.

[The blonde is silent for a while, his blue eyes vacant with thought, one hand perfectly still in a vicegrip on Maribelle’s reins.]

Let us outside, and I'll give you an answer.

[Diarmuid shakes his head and sighs. As he does, the house shifts once more so that the three are suddenly standing only a few feet from the door.]

Does it really have to be someone's fault? It was an accident, even if it was one that could have been avoided.

[With a small wave of his hand, the door swings open. Best to let the jumpy man with the horse go first.]

After you.

[He quickly leads Maribelle out of the house, out if the yard, and onto the street before turning back. Interestingly, his position puts him squarely between Diarmuid and the horse.]

Don't touch me.

[Is that it….]

You can figure out the rest as we go along. Don't worry, I'm not some weepy royal child who cries at the sight of an insult.

[Diarmuid raises an eyebrow at him.]

I wasn't going to?

[He can't he but sign when he hears Laurent's 'solution,' though. Really, he should have expected it, but what does he say in response? Diarmuid isn't sure and so his response is soft, almost tentative.]

You realize this is about more than you, right? You may not weep, but that doesn't mean my heart won't weep for you each time I stumble into something that pains you.

[Momentarily Laurent's expression is readable. It reads ‘blindsided?? and,, confused???????’.

(There's a slight flush too, obvious on his pale skin, that suggests he might be the least bit affected [and furiously denying it.]) ]

I can't- I'm not a good person to be around. [The words are pushed out, with effort.] If it affects you that badly you should leave.

[emotions are so hard…...]

And- I meant, I don't like being touched. You asked.

I remember the dream--what happened to him--and I still don't believe that about you.

[Slowly, Diarmuid makes his way down the front stairs bringing himself a little closer to Laurent and the horse. Closer, but not too close. He couldn't reach out and touch either of them even if he tried.]

Bad things happen to good people, and sometimes, they even twist those people into things they never wanted to be. I won't hold that against you no matter how much you want me to.

I won't touch you if you don't want it, but a world without touch is a lonely place, a place no one deserves to be no matter what they have done.

No-

[no. The word is soft, distinctly agitated.

I still don't believe that about you.

no-

The last time someone had said that- he is false, and you are true- it had almost cost him his life, it had cost Laurent a wish. Too much cost. It could happen again.

Maribelle broadcasts his emotion for him, her ears pricked and twitching nervously. Something is wrong with her human. But perhaps even at that distance Diarmuid can pick it up himself- that's what empath means, right- distress.]

Are you suggesting we fuck? I get that a lot-

[He’s not thinking.]

I- I have to go.

[Awful excuse. If anything, he's freed up his schedule in anticipation of dying. He's getting on Maribelle and fleeing if he's not interrupted.

Disaster. What a disaster. He can't think, not after whatever the fuck that was. It frightens him.]

[The distress rolls into Diarmuid's mind like some kind of fog. At first, he thinks someone else nearby must be the cause. After all, he can't imagine why his words would have caused such a reaction from Laurent. This is doubly true considering how much the blond tends to hide behind his walls. Why distress? Why so strong it borders on fear?

When Laurent finally speaks--finally moves--there is no doubt that the emotion is coming from him. That realization in and of itself is enough to shock Diarmuid into stillness, then the meaning of the other man's words hit him and Diarmuid's mind completely derails.]

W-what are you talking about?

[The question comes too late, though. Whether it only took seconds or minutes for Diarmuid to finally get the words out of his mouth, Laurent has already gone. Climbed on his horse in a blink of an eye and gone.

Diarmuid blinks at the sudden departure, hand rubbing over his mouth as he tries and fails to figure out what just happened. Where had he gone wrong? Why...]

Why does kindness scare him so?

[The words are whispered for no one in particular. Even so, Diarmuid really wishes an answer would come. There is no answer, though. Only silence.]

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cw: some sexual language?

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