oathshackledbird | Ruby City Mailbox/Inbox

Sure. I remember seeing you with that before actually.

[He just hadn't gotten around to asking about it yet.]

Is it a complicated situation that you could uncomplicated for me, because that whole 'You may not have been entirely wrong to make that mistake' comment does not set me at ease.

This conversation doesn't go past here, okay? Don't tell anyone, and in fact don't even let on that you know. The only people that are going to know about this are myself, Jotaro, Giovanna, and you. I respect Giovanna enough that I'm not going to go around telling everyone about something that he clearly dislikes, and the only reason I'm telling you is because I'm screwed up about the whole thing and I need to talk to someone that isn't involved.

It seems as though they're related. He's Dio's son by blood (and I guess related to Jotaro by extension, I have no idea exactly how this works with Jonathan Joestar's body in the equation.)

...it's just weird, Diarmuid. They're similar, but they couldn't be more different. Giovanna's kind, but I can tell he's dangerous. The sort of person you'd be eternally grateful is on your side, you know what I mean? I feel like I should logically be terrified of him, but it's exactly the opposite. There's no question in my mind he's absolutely trustworthy.

Of course.

[Diarmuid has to wonder what he is about to find out that requires such a serious promise. Once he reads the full text, though, he understands.]

Just like Donn...

[Diarmuid too has a parent who he does not acknowledge. Of course, Donn had not killed as many as Dio. He had been a lazy, selfish and unknightly man, but he had only killed one innocent that Diarmuid knows of. He doesn't want to think about how many innocent lives Dio took before he was stopped.]

Our hearts and our heads often give up opposite answers to difficult questions, so don't be upset with yourself for feeling that way. Dio killed you. Of course, you should naturally fear anything tied to him, but at the same time--as Jotaro says--you are a very level-headed person. You would not blame a son for the sins of his father. You are not letting his father's shadow color your views of him.

Of course I wouldn't do that. Giovanna's different, radically so--it's only taken one conversation with him to determine that much. He's a good person at heart, I think. Maybe not a shining example of good morality, but we aren't either. Even if he is worth trusting, neither of us expected anything like this. Least of all so soon after everything.

Jotaro's wrong, I'm not levelheaded at all. I nearly snapped when we were talking to him last night: he figured out what happened to me and I almost had a nervous breakdown on the spot.

We're both...really screwed up over Egypt, you know? And whatever Giovanna's been through, I get the impression he might be the same way.

I suspect Dio wasn't around much during his childhood, was he? In that Giovanna was lucky because it gave him the chance to grow up to be his own person. The kindness was not crushed out of him. Sure, we call can be dangerous when we are crossed, but that is okay. As you say, none of us are perfect. Why does snapping when you are surprised or uneasy make you not levelheaded? We all do that sometimes, Kakyoin. Don't be so hard on yourself, especially when it comes to reacting to something so emotional for you. It has not been that long and to run into such a reminder of Dio is justifiably unbalancing for you. It is probably unsettling for him to have run into those so intimately tied to his father as well. Give yourselves time. It will help. And then, you can help each other.

He says he's never known his father--I didn't think to ask what year it was when he came here, but I believe that.

...I don't know what to do about any part of this situation. I've never seen Jotaro like this before. He's always been the steady and stoic one, and I've always been the logical one. But I can't think straight anymore and he's not as composed as he was. I'm worried about him, I know he's worried about me, and I'm not sure how long we can manage even with the other supporting them.

[For the moment, Diarmuid lets the topic of Giovanna and Dio pass. He is more worried about Kakyoin himself.]

Listen, you both are dealing with a lot right now. That is what life changing events do to you. This place--it both gives you time you might not have had to deal with things, but also sometimes rushes you into dealing with things you might not be ready to deal with yet. Don't push yourselves so hard to be okay. I know you are both stronger than it seems right now but if you ever can't hold each other up? Remember, the rest of us are here to help. We don't understand in the same way, but we are still your friends. You're not facing this alone. Neither of you.

I know that--that's why I'm talking to you in the first place. Because I don't know if I can handle this.

Every so often, I have to stop and make sure I'm still breathing, or check my pulse to make sure I'm still alive. As confident as I want to be about finding a way home that doesn't kill me, I know that I'm already dead and I know that there might not be any way like that. But I have to be confident and certain for him, because that's the only hope either of us have.

I wasn't afraid to die, but I'm sure as hell afraid of what'll happen to him if I do.

[It's a valid fear Kakyoin has and as much as Diarmuid wants to be happy that Kakyoin himself is now so willing to talk to someone outside of other Stand users about this, he is distracted from that by the complexity of the problem the teen and Jotaro face.]

Do you really have to be that confident and certain for him? When he is your friend? When you two are so close?

[Diarmuid could say more. He could explain that friends don't have to hide their fears and their hurt from each other, but he wants to see if Kakyoin can put it together first. Hope...hope is a funny thing and it often takes forms that no one would ever expect.]

He's always done the same for me. Every time I almost thought 'yeah, we're definitely all going to die', he was completely calm. Maybe that was only on the outside--in fact, it probably was--but it was still the kind of composure I needed when everything seemed hopeless.

What kind of friend would I be if I couldn't try to do the same? I want to be the steady and calm one when he can't, isn't that what it means to support each other?

Not necessarily. This is probably going to sound strange, but hear me out, okay? Jotaro isn't friends with himself. He is friends with you. When he needs someone to be strong for him and looks to you, he doesn't want to see himself reflected there. He wants to see you. Just because that is how he is when you need someone to be strong, doesn't mean that is what he needs when he is looking for support. If you really want to help him in those times? Ask him what he wants you to do and then give him what he needs in your own way. You don't need to mimic him to support him. Just be yourself.

Have I really been looking at this the wrong way? I thought

[He paused abruptly, trying to process this correctly.]

Is that the right way for friends to support each other?

The most important thing to remember about true friendship is that people are friends with you. Not who you pretend to be. Not who you mimic. Any action that would cause you to hide yourself from your friends is the wrong action to take. Friends celebrate together, but they are also not okay together. Friends don't assume they know what the other wants or needs. They ask. As long as you support him as Kakyoin--and no one else--would, things will work out. I promise.

I don't know if that person is really the kind worth having as a friend, or the kind that can support anyone.

I can only say that I'll try.

Hey, answer a question for me, will you? You trust Jotaro, right?

Absolutely, with my life.

Why?

If you are willing to trust him with your life, then be willing to trust that he is right when he thinks you are worth having as a friend. Because you know what? He is.

[It took a minute for him to respond, trying very hard and failing to come up with any real argument for that.]

You might have a point. I'm still not certain myself, but I can try to trust his judgment and yours.

[Diarmuid smiles.]

That is all I ever ask of anyone. That they try.

I know that.

I'm sorry I keep troubling you with this kind of thing. I just don't really know who else to talk to right now.

Kakyoin, that is not something you need to be sorry about. Me calling you 'Baby Cherry' over the Network where everyone could see? Now that is something to be sorry about. I am here to listen whenever you need me to be.

Still sounds better than Tenmei, at least.

...Speaking of which, let's forget I ever told anyone that name, okay? I really don't care for it.

Oh? I like how the name sounds, but if that is what you want, then you have my word that is how it will be. Just tell me why you don't like it so much one day, okay?

I can tell you right now, it's not like it's some big dramatic secret. I just never felt like it suited me that well. Always sounded kind of formal, really.

'Tenmei' and 'Noriaki' are both written as 典明; 'scripture' and 'bright'. I just read it differently than my parents do, simple.

Oh!

[Diarmuid blinks in surprise, having expected a lot more considering how personal names are to most people.]

Japanese is sure an interesting language. What did your parents think of that?

Ruby City Mailbox/Inbox

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)